"They stopped the metro for like 40 minutes...and she didn't even die!"
Now, to be fair, this is a tiny piece of a conversation I overheard while walking by two women talking in a parking lot.
I absolutely cannot say any of the following with 100% certainty:
1) That the speaker herself had been delayed for 40 minutes on the DC metro.
2) That the "she" to whom the speaker was referring's potential (but not resulting) death was somehow the cause of the speaker being delayed for 40 minutes on the DC metro.
3) That the speaker would somehow have felt better about having been delayed for 40 minutes on the DC metro had the "she" to whom she was referring actually died.
So no, I don't know that any of these things are true (but I'm pretty sure they are all true).
I've said it before and I'll say it again - there are a lot of reasons I love DC:
- beautiful green areas and lots of places to go for long runs
- the hustle and bustle of everyday life
- interesting people around every corner
- the constant feeling that something important is happening
- 4 major sports teams
- ease of public transportation
- mild winters
BUT
- friendliness and mutual concern....ummm,yeah, not so much.
The thing about the aforementioned quotation is that, at the time I heard it, I wasn't exactly shocked.
Ok, yes, it made an impression, but the idea that a person would be annoyed with another person for almost dying (but not actually following through) because it caused a 40 minute delay in their day, didn't seem totally unreasonable. 40 minutes is a long time. In 40 minutes you could miss an important meeting...or appointment...or lunch...or movie...
It was only when I thought about it for a second, and thought about my own (at first) understanding of the annoyance, that I realized what I was validating.
A 40 minute delay because of track work - annoying.
A 40 minute delay because there is an event in DC and the trains are being slow - annoying.
A 40 minute delay because a train is stalled - annoying.
But a 40 minute delay because somebody almost died and then didn't - I think maybe that's acceptable.
The self-realization came just in time - apparently I'm not a callous person yet....yet.
Still, this moment walking across a parking lot served as a very clear warning to me of how, with all of the things I love about DC, it is a very easy place to fall into an extremely uncaring state of mind.
They say that if you live here for 4 years, you will develop allergies (since the District is basically built on a swamp)...but is it also possible that after 9 years you start to lose feelings?
I suddenly felt a very real need to guard myself against the inevitable - a need to take action.
I needed a jolt of positive-ness, an injection of friendly, a blast of caring.
As fate would have it, in less than a week (and clearly just in time) I had a ticket to board a plane bound for the ideal place for the positive-ness, friendly and caring that I was seeking - my 10 year college reunion in, you guessed it, Minnesota.
I was on my way to the land of lakes, big shopping malls and friendly....everything was going to be ok.
The weekend was exactly what I needed.
Aside from the joy of seeing family, friends, and new babies (all natural cures to grumpiness), I enjoyed random shots of positivity around every corner.
It started with an excellent book recommendation from the woman at the book store during our layover at the Chicago Airport (you can't go straight from "DC unfriendly" to "MN friendly" because it would be too much of a shock..."Chicago kinda-friendly" is a good transition) who told me with enthusiasm that I NEEDED to read "The Hunger Games" -that I would be addicted to the trilogy by the second chapter (she was right).
This was followed by a very nice conversation with the checker at Owatonna, MN Walmart who felt very strongly that, despite the forecast of rain, it was going to be a beautiful day (she was also right).
Then came a McDonalds drive thru with an incredibly cheerful attendant, who seemed genuinely happy to be providing us with 1 tea and 1 mocha with whip for our journey to my grandmother's house.
On our drive to visit Grandma in rural Minnesota (Comfrey, MN pop: 367 ) drivers kept waving at us...even though they didn't even know us...crazy!
Similarly, on my morning run at my parents' house in Owatonna, numerous runners, bikers, and dog walkers said hello and waved and an older gentleman told me to "go faster" with a smile and a high 5.
As we were leaving campus at the end of the weekend, the man at the college bookstore excitedly rang up my St. Olaf merchandise, and smiled at me as though I were the first person to ever purchase a St. Olaf license plate cover (at St. Olaf...in the bookstore...on the 3rd day of a reunion weekend).
And so I returned to DC on Sunday night with a renewed sense of "friendly, caring, positive" and with a distinct fear of falling back into the old pattern of "not friendly, caring or positive".
How was I going to hold on to this energy in a place where so many every day interactions are at worst hostile and at best indifferent?
At lunch time I found my answer in the little deli in the building next to our office. As I walked up to the counter to purchase my food I was greeted by the store owner's booming voice and thick Korean accent,
"Hello Miss Banana Diet Coke! Where were you on Friday - we missed you!"
I almost started to cry right then and there.
Even here, in the greater DC area, friendliness can be found in the most unexpected of places - apparently, all you have to do is buy the exact same lunch every single day for 5 years
(and steer clear of causing metro delays...for ANY reason).
Now, to be fair, this is a tiny piece of a conversation I overheard while walking by two women talking in a parking lot.
I absolutely cannot say any of the following with 100% certainty:
1) That the speaker herself had been delayed for 40 minutes on the DC metro.
2) That the "she" to whom the speaker was referring's potential (but not resulting) death was somehow the cause of the speaker being delayed for 40 minutes on the DC metro.
3) That the speaker would somehow have felt better about having been delayed for 40 minutes on the DC metro had the "she" to whom she was referring actually died.
So no, I don't know that any of these things are true (but I'm pretty sure they are all true).
I've said it before and I'll say it again - there are a lot of reasons I love DC:
- beautiful green areas and lots of places to go for long runs
- the hustle and bustle of everyday life
- interesting people around every corner
- the constant feeling that something important is happening
- 4 major sports teams
- ease of public transportation
- mild winters
BUT
- friendliness and mutual concern....ummm,yeah, not so much.
The thing about the aforementioned quotation is that, at the time I heard it, I wasn't exactly shocked.
Ok, yes, it made an impression, but the idea that a person would be annoyed with another person for almost dying (but not actually following through) because it caused a 40 minute delay in their day, didn't seem totally unreasonable. 40 minutes is a long time. In 40 minutes you could miss an important meeting...or appointment...or lunch...or movie...
It was only when I thought about it for a second, and thought about my own (at first) understanding of the annoyance, that I realized what I was validating.
A 40 minute delay because of track work - annoying.
A 40 minute delay because there is an event in DC and the trains are being slow - annoying.
A 40 minute delay because a train is stalled - annoying.
But a 40 minute delay because somebody almost died and then didn't - I think maybe that's acceptable.
The self-realization came just in time - apparently I'm not a callous person yet....yet.
Still, this moment walking across a parking lot served as a very clear warning to me of how, with all of the things I love about DC, it is a very easy place to fall into an extremely uncaring state of mind.
They say that if you live here for 4 years, you will develop allergies (since the District is basically built on a swamp)...but is it also possible that after 9 years you start to lose feelings?
I suddenly felt a very real need to guard myself against the inevitable - a need to take action.
I needed a jolt of positive-ness, an injection of friendly, a blast of caring.
As fate would have it, in less than a week (and clearly just in time) I had a ticket to board a plane bound for the ideal place for the positive-ness, friendly and caring that I was seeking - my 10 year college reunion in, you guessed it, Minnesota.
I was on my way to the land of lakes, big shopping malls and friendly....everything was going to be ok.
The weekend was exactly what I needed.
Aside from the joy of seeing family, friends, and new babies (all natural cures to grumpiness), I enjoyed random shots of positivity around every corner.
It started with an excellent book recommendation from the woman at the book store during our layover at the Chicago Airport (you can't go straight from "DC unfriendly" to "MN friendly" because it would be too much of a shock..."Chicago kinda-friendly" is a good transition) who told me with enthusiasm that I NEEDED to read "The Hunger Games" -that I would be addicted to the trilogy by the second chapter (she was right).
This was followed by a very nice conversation with the checker at Owatonna, MN Walmart who felt very strongly that, despite the forecast of rain, it was going to be a beautiful day (she was also right).
Then came a McDonalds drive thru with an incredibly cheerful attendant, who seemed genuinely happy to be providing us with 1 tea and 1 mocha with whip for our journey to my grandmother's house.
On our drive to visit Grandma in rural Minnesota (Comfrey, MN pop: 367 ) drivers kept waving at us...even though they didn't even know us...crazy!
Similarly, on my morning run at my parents' house in Owatonna, numerous runners, bikers, and dog walkers said hello and waved and an older gentleman told me to "go faster" with a smile and a high 5.
As we were leaving campus at the end of the weekend, the man at the college bookstore excitedly rang up my St. Olaf merchandise, and smiled at me as though I were the first person to ever purchase a St. Olaf license plate cover (at St. Olaf...in the bookstore...on the 3rd day of a reunion weekend).
And so I returned to DC on Sunday night with a renewed sense of "friendly, caring, positive" and with a distinct fear of falling back into the old pattern of "not friendly, caring or positive".
How was I going to hold on to this energy in a place where so many every day interactions are at worst hostile and at best indifferent?
At lunch time I found my answer in the little deli in the building next to our office. As I walked up to the counter to purchase my food I was greeted by the store owner's booming voice and thick Korean accent,
"Hello Miss Banana Diet Coke! Where were you on Friday - we missed you!"
I almost started to cry right then and there.
Even here, in the greater DC area, friendliness can be found in the most unexpected of places - apparently, all you have to do is buy the exact same lunch every single day for 5 years
(and steer clear of causing metro delays...for ANY reason).
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